Simply E3 Photography: August 2013

I'm officially 38 weeks pregnant with my second child. My little girl can arrive any moment and my OCD tendencies in addition to my "nesting" has been in full swing for the last year (my nesting began before I actually conceived). My bags are packed (with a list of things to be added), newborn clothing and necessities are cleaned and sanitized (I hope), the house is tidy (for the most part), laundry is being kept up with (unless you count that basket that needs to be folded), and my physical and emotional state is ready to welcome my daughter in the world (bringing her home into our lives is a different story).

How prepared can you really be? I remember this point of my pregnancy with Jude. The normal new parental anxieties were settling in although slightly enhanced by the mere fact that I was less than a month settled into a new country. Thousands of miles and a great big ocean separated me from the familiar comforts of friends and family and a 24 hour Target down the street. While I had my bags packed, food prepped in the freezer, every gadget I thought I needed, I went into labor with more knowledge of the stages of pregnancy than newborn care and just my husband to rely on through the first few months of life with a tiny human. I survived, barely, but I survived.

It took time but I learned a few tricks of the trade to care for a child. I made life time friends with some women and families on our base, started my walk with God, and learned to navigate the German economy while also realizing the simplicity of life (aka, not needing every infant accessory on the market).

Today I have a healthy and thriving almost 4 year old little boy who despite my inexperience of parental knowledge is managing okay with life (unless he doesn't get his way of course). I've been settled in Texas for almost a year, have abundance of friends and family in the area (and a short plane ride away), a great spiritual family, and more big box stores in a 10mi radius than one knows what to do with. Despite those conveniences, I've learned the anxieties of motherhood don't go away, they just transform.

It will take time, a few stumbles, many tears, an abundance of prayers, and constant reminders but I will learn to balance a life between two children, a husband, friends, and myself. I will learn to cope with sleepless nights and having to be alert for an active preschooler. I will understand that I don't have all of the answers, just the best intentions of raising my children. I will accept that my house doesn't need to be perfect, just functional. I will have better excuses for being at least 10 minutes late to everything despite my best effort. I will realize yet again the important things in life, how to be content in the present, and to live more simply.

Just like everything else in this season of my life, I have Emma's room "mostly" prepared. I'm still waiting on a beautiful hand crafted bird mobile from Etsy my friend ordered for me and a few family photos that will give life to this space. More importantly though, I'm waiting on the little girl that will transform our family of 3 into a family of 4 and all of the blessings and challenges to go with it.